strip club outing

I am the mother of two girls and one boy. The boy is my second child. He is very close to his father and he can get away with a lot of wrongs. When our son became 18 years old, his father told him that he is now a big man and he should have sex with as many women as he can. I objected to what he was telling our son and his father said that I wanted the boy to grow up like a girl. Now my son has so many girlfriends, he cannot even count them.

My husband allows him to drive the car sometimes to carry out his girlfriends and he gives him money, too, to buy gifts for them. I found out that on his 18th birthday, he took our son to a strip club. My son looked at me and reminded me that he was 18 when I expressed shock at where he went. I told him that he was still a child as far as I was concerned. The boy used to go to church. Now he prefers to go out with his father on a Sunday.

He locks away in his room looking at adult movies and his father thinks nothing is wrong with it. I asked him if he would like men to fool around his girl children as his son is doing to other girls. I went into his drawer and in one of them I saw different types of condoms – some plain ones and some fruit-scented ones. My husband thinks that I am playing God and the boy should do what he can do because this world doesn’t have enough men to meet the needs of women.

V.D.

Dear V.D.,kushkxng.wordpress.com

What your husband is doing is trying to get your son to love him even more. Some men believe that when their boy children get to a certain age they should let them loose. They encourage them to have sex with as many women as possible. That is one way to prove their manhood. Some men take their sons to the bar and encourage them to drink hard liquor. And they think that it is fun to welcome their sons to the waterhole.

Surely, your husband could have taken your son somewhere else and he could have introduced him to the business world and encouraged him to become an entrepreneur. If the young man did not own stocks, he could have also bought stocks for him in businesses. The money he is teaching him to waste in clubs and on girls could have been spent better. Shame on your husband.

As a responsible mother you have to continue to talk because, clearly, your husband is not setting good examples for your son.